favorite things

By: ewhite422

Apr 19 2010

Category: Uncategorized

2 Comments


I am in the Rocky Mountains, taking care of a dear friend who just underwent bilateral mastectomy after a breast cancer diagnosis.  She is younger than I.  Her children are 7 and 9 years old, and she has a lot of living to do to raise them.  I was honored that she would want me to be in her home at this critical time.

I have a few “tricks” that are my standards when providing care.  Chicken soup is one.  In fact, when I asked her, “When you were a kid, what used to make you feel better when you were sick?”

“Chicken soup,” she replied.

Whew!  I was so glad that she didn’t say, for example, crawfish etouffe!  I would have been “up a creek.”

So I’m trying to pull together all her favorite things.  What movies does she like?  What about chocolate?  How about music?

It’s important for healing.  I once had a therapist who was trying to help me deal with extreme stress.  She said, “Write down everything you love.  I don’t care what it is.  It could be mountain streams or eggs benedict.  Write it down.”

I showed up with my long list at my next appointment.

“Good,” she said.  “Now, it is your responsibility that you have at least 2 things from this list on a daily basis, because a lack of your favorite things only adds stress.”

That’s been a good lesson.  I make sure to include at least 2 things daily, and I have help.  My husband has my list.  That’s why he plants flowers in our yard and brings fresh ones home for our kitchen on a regular basis.  He makes coffee and serves it with my newspaper in the mornings.  If I get sick, he buys magazines and old Lucille Ball tv episodes.  I bounce back faster!  I’m sure of it!

What things are on your list?

Could you hand that list over to a care giver, if something happened to you and a friend was trying provide the care you desperately needed?  It’s kind of like “operating instructions.”

So far, I know my friend likes mustard and mayonnaise on her sandwich for lunch, and she likes biscuits for breakfast.  Favorite things are important!  They remind us of what we love about life and give us energy to heal.

What are your favorites?

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2 comments on “favorite things”

  1. Thanks, Elaine, for the reminder. I need to do that list again and give it to Cindy.

    And, I need you to know something… you have impacted my life. Thank you.


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