Problems with “Down There”

My mother was the head nurse for 3 OB/GYNs in my west Texas hometown.  She knew the women patients “intimately.”  And she was a bossy nurse, who told everyone what to do, even the doctor.

I was in awe of her, except when she was telling ME what to do.

I used to love to hear her stories about her experience at the doctor’s office.  Here’s one…

A patient for whom English was a second language called the doctor’s office in a furious rage, “I’m pregnant and the doctor gave me those pills to keep me from getting pregnant!”

My mother, who took all the doctor’s calls before anyone got through to him, asked, “Well, did you take the pill everyday?”

“Yes,” she said, “But the damn thing kept falling out!!!”

We have laughed about that for years.

But here’s a laughable story about us.  A couple of years ago, when my mother was still at home at age 78, she insisted that she had to go to the gynecologist.  My dad called me and asked me to make an appointment.

We sat at the head of the table in the examining room with Mom while the nurse practitioner got her into the stirrups and ready for the doctor to come in.  She inserted the speculum.

“She has had a hysterectomy!  Just what do you want us to check?” she asked, more than a little aggravated.

My dad and I looked at each other and telepathically shared the thought, “Oh shit! We forgot she had a hysterectomy!”

I asked the nurse to step outside the room into the hallway. “Look,” I said, “She was a nurse for an OB/GYN for decades and now she says she needs to see a gynecologist.  Isn’t there SOMETHING you could check?”

She softened her attitude and suggested they do a urine test, and sure enough, Mom had a urinary tract infection.

My dad and I got her the medicine and laughed at ourselves all the way home.

Sometimes, you just have to laugh.



2 comments on “Problems with “Down There””

  1. U are so gifted! Keep sharing!!!

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